I've been wondering lately if my husband and I have been together so long now that we just natually suck the energy from each other. Since he's been laid off, he's started painting, which is a great thing. He's feeling really good about the stuff he's creating and he should, because he's a very talented artist. But since I've been back to work, I'm feeling more and more depressed.
I felt so happy, hopeful, rested and calm while I was unemployed. Working every day makes me all stressed and angry. I never want to talk to anyone when I get home and mostly, I just want to sit around all evening, occassionally perusing my Twitter feed for anything interesting and watching TV. No, really. That's all I want to do.
More and more, I just don't feel like I have the mental energy to write any posts, or read any books, or do anything at all productive. If it involves thought on my part. I'm just not up to it.
So I'm just wondering if it's possible that there's only just so much creative energy to share between the two of us and, if that's true, is he using it all up right now?
People Underestimate the Value of a Good Ramble
Friday, March 26, 2010
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
They Say A Woman's Work Is Never Done
There is no such thing as unisex. Men and women are completely and utterly genetically different. Completely.
A conversation I had with a woman from work the other day really set me off on this. She was telling me how when her husband gets their daughter ready for school for her he leaves the child's other clothes laying around instead of putting them away or in the hamper. My issue was that she used the phrase "for me" as in, "he got our daughter ready for school for me." Why for her? Isn't that his daughter, too? Isn't he just as responsible for her welfare and schooling as her mother?
I really wonder at these old fashioned ideals that we continue to carry around with us, stereo-typing each role we perform in our day-to-day lives. For example, ask a man to empty the dishwasher and, I've found, he will do exactly that. Empty it. No where in his genetic make up does "empty the dishwasher" necessarily also mean that he should put away the clean dishes and and then deal with that pile of dirty dishes in the sink by putting them into the now empty machine.
Women tend to know, without being told, that a dishwasher full of clean dishes should be emptied, the clean dishes put away, and then the washer re-loaded with all the dirty dishes waiting to be made clean. This is not a task that is somehow exclusively feminine in any way that I can see. Men use dishes, too. Yet, they just don't seem to grasp the full concept of tasks that are traditionally considered woman's work.
And I'll be honest, I'd be a very happy homemaker. I'd June Cleaver my days through cooking, cleaning (maybe not too much cleaning), laundry, sewing, whatever housewifely chores need doing. I doubt I'd do it in a twinset and pearls, but still, I'd be happy. I have no need to hold down a job outside of the home. (Just think of all the time I'd have to read and write!!) But, unfortunately, our household budget requires that I work a full-time job that brings in a certain amount of cash every week. So, since we both work full-time jobs (well, we did until my husband was laid off last June), why is it that the cooking, the cleaning, the laundry and the dishes are still somehow woman's work?
A conversation I had with a woman from work the other day really set me off on this. She was telling me how when her husband gets their daughter ready for school for her he leaves the child's other clothes laying around instead of putting them away or in the hamper. My issue was that she used the phrase "for me" as in, "he got our daughter ready for school for me." Why for her? Isn't that his daughter, too? Isn't he just as responsible for her welfare and schooling as her mother?
I really wonder at these old fashioned ideals that we continue to carry around with us, stereo-typing each role we perform in our day-to-day lives. For example, ask a man to empty the dishwasher and, I've found, he will do exactly that. Empty it. No where in his genetic make up does "empty the dishwasher" necessarily also mean that he should put away the clean dishes and and then deal with that pile of dirty dishes in the sink by putting them into the now empty machine.
Women tend to know, without being told, that a dishwasher full of clean dishes should be emptied, the clean dishes put away, and then the washer re-loaded with all the dirty dishes waiting to be made clean. This is not a task that is somehow exclusively feminine in any way that I can see. Men use dishes, too. Yet, they just don't seem to grasp the full concept of tasks that are traditionally considered woman's work.
And I'll be honest, I'd be a very happy homemaker. I'd June Cleaver my days through cooking, cleaning (maybe not too much cleaning), laundry, sewing, whatever housewifely chores need doing. I doubt I'd do it in a twinset and pearls, but still, I'd be happy. I have no need to hold down a job outside of the home. (Just think of all the time I'd have to read and write!!) But, unfortunately, our household budget requires that I work a full-time job that brings in a certain amount of cash every week. So, since we both work full-time jobs (well, we did until my husband was laid off last June), why is it that the cooking, the cleaning, the laundry and the dishes are still somehow woman's work?
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