Friday, October 14, 2011
Everything that's happened over the last few months has made me feel extremely depressed, but even so I've been trying to move past it. You know, just deal with it and keep a smiley face.
I'm sort of a fatalist, I guess. Or maybe that's not really the correct term, cause it's not that I think things can't be changed or that everything is predetermined. It's just that I always feel like things are going to work out the way they should. Usually they do.
But I'm also a worrier. I know that those two concepts seem to be the antithesis of each other. And yet.
So even though right now things seem to be working out just the way they should, I'm still waking up with a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach, not able to eat breakfast. (Believe me, it's very rare that I'm not able to eat.) But then I have this wild mood swing to the other side and I feel super excited and deliriously happy.
Then I'm worried we're making a mistake. Then I'm thrilled that we're getting this chance and that it worked out so well for us. Then I panic again for a while.
I'm a huge proponent of change. I think it's good to change things up on a regular basis. Although, I'm not one of those people who change their furniture around all the time or whatever. I just get bored easily and I'm looking for something new and interesting. Maybe all the depression lately is why I felt the need for a dramatic change in my life now.
Anyway, I think we've found it. The change we need right now to make things better and new.
I promise to tell you all about it. Soon.