Is Wanting Someone To Lose The Same As Caring Who Wins?

From AmericanIdol.com

Please tell me that someone will at least stop these country cousins from singing all country music for the finale of American Idol. Please.

The only positive I can find is that tonight is only an hour and not two hours. Maybe God does love me.

So we start out the show with clips that prove all the people on American Idol were also annoyingly precocious children. Laura, watching the clip of 8 year old Scotty McCreery talking about AI, said, when I was 8, there was no AI. Well, when I was 8, there was no color TV.  So there.

Why do we have to bring up that Lauren Alaina was having voice problems? She does not deserve any pity. The more you try to sway my vote, the more I intensely dislike her. Intensely. Also, I blew out a vocal cord once, it was hemorrhaging, but I still managed to sing in a Christmas concert. You actually use a different part of your vocal cord for singing than you do for talking. And it doesn't hurt at all.

This week, the kids choose their first song from their favorites they've song this season, the second song is chosen for them by their Idol. Carrie Underwood chooses for Lauren and George Strait chooses for Scotty. Their third song is apparently the song that will be their first single. If they win, that is.

Scotty wins the toss, but chooses to go first, so it's like he's trying to jeopardize his chances. Or maybe he's just so confident of the win he wants to prove he can do it no matter what the odds.

Round One
Scotty McCreey: Gone, by some country person - It sounds exactly the same way it sounded the last time he sang it and I didn't listen.

Lauren Alaina: Flat On the Floor, some other country person - I have nothing to say.

Um...is there no judging?

Round Two
Scotty McCreey: Check Yes or No, George Strait - Oh, look Scotty is singing a country song. Written by a country person and chosen for him by a country person. In a country sorta twangy way.

Somehow, Scotty has gotten cute. I hope he wins. I think he will, but I hope he does. I hope it's a landslide. 

Lauren Alaina: Maybe It Was Memphis, yet a third country person - I hope she loses. 

So here's the judging. Randy says Scotty had a slight edge in Round One and Lauren has a slight edge in Round Two. Let me guess, Round Three will be a tie?

Jennifer agrees with him. Steven gives both rounds to Lauren, cause she's prettier than Scotty. Um, yep.

So those people behind the table are acting like this show has been good so far. It has not. This show absolutely sucks so far.  

And now they are forcing me to watch some person I've never heard of auto-tune his way through some dance beat crap apparently written by American Idol viewers. Well, I had nothing to do with it and I resent Ryan's implication that I was somehow involved.

I've been saving this particular Twitter quote because I knew it would come in handy at some point.  Back in March, @ashman01 (Ashley Edward Miller) said, "I think we can all agree that the inventor of auto-tune needs to be taken out and publicly beaten to death." I believe that time has come.  

Round Three

Scotty McCreey: I Love You This Big - I'm so glad they found something for Jimmy to do this week. It's just not American Idol without him now. At least that's what I always say. The return of the swaybots, however, was something I could have lived without. OK, I feel like I have to weigh in on that song. It was kinda boring.  Laura said, I don't think that's a number one song. 

Lauren Alaina: Like My Mother Does -  Hey, is that a little tiny Leprechaun mandolin player? How cute is he!  Anyway, remember my intense dislike for Lauren from earlier? It has intensified even more since I had to sit here and listen to her sing three country songs. I hope I never, ever hear from or see her again. Ever.

First of all, can I just say how happy I am that we're not going to the concert?

Laura's comments...this is the worst finale ever. There were no standout moments and it was all country. Plus, no one cares about either one of these people.  I couldn't agree more.

It appears that the powers that be have decided that Lauren must win. I guess they just have to have a girl win this year so they don't have a fourth boring-white-guy-with-a-guitar as winner.

This entire show has been bent over backwards for her, to make everything think she was awesome, but she truly was as boring and bland and lifeless as always.  Of course, Carrie was pretty boring, too, and she won, so I guess there's no accounting for taste. My sister just called to ask me what they are hearing that the rest of us aren't? Cause she thinks Scotty was great and Lauren was just so-so.

Personally, I still think Scotty has this thing locked up. Not because I care, but because he's been the top vote getter every week since the beginning. That has to mean something.

I remember when I used to really care about who won this show. This year I'm more focused on hoping that Lauren loses. 

Idol Seems To Be The Hardest Word

From AmericanIdol.com

Getting ready for Top 11 Redux on American Idol tonight. It’s also Elton John night and I love how they said there wouldn’t be restrictive theme nights this year. Then they went ahead and had these restrictive themes.

That’s Idol, always doing the stupid thing.

As usual, I’m starting late so I can fast-forward through commercials and other stuff….and…um, say what’s going on with Ryan’s hair?

I’m a little surprised about Elton John night, cause they haven’t done one since season 3, I believe, when he called them racist for having the three divas in the B3. I guess since J Hud has her Oscar now, all is forgiven.

So, let’s get right on to the singing…

Scotty McCreery: Country Comfort – Well, I could have called that one since Scotty only sings country music and Elton only had like two country-ish songs off his country album that only his most die hard fans have heard.

Naima Adedapa: I'm Still Standing - I like reggae, but I didn't like that. If she wanted to sing a song with a reggae feel, why not just sing Island Girl. Granted that song is about prostitution, but most people probably have no idea what the lyrics are anyway. Besides, shouldn't Casey have sung this song? Naima should go home now.

Paul McDonald: Rocket Man - I would never have called this one for Paul, maybe James, but not Paul. I think I was right, too, cause that wasn't good. His phrasing was all over the place and sounded kinda awkward, plus his voice got a bit lost. He would have been better on Sad Songs Say So Much or Tiny Dancer. But did he ask me? No!

Pia Toscano: Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me - Right, she's singing another ballad. Color me completely unsurprised. But maybe that's her strategy. Tell America every week that the next week you'll sing something up tempo, but keep singing ballads. That way they keep you around to hear you do something different. The fact is, Pia has a great voice, so singing the ballads isn't really a bad thing. Look at Carrie Underwood, she was boring and just stood there singing the same type of song every week. And she won.

Did Pia just give away the theme for next week?

Stefano Langone: Tiny Dancer - It wouldn't be my first choice for Stefano and it's not one of my favorite Elton songs, but he sounded good. Stefano is basically always on tune and his voice has a very nice sound. There's no bad here.

I've just realized that I've put down all the Idols' names and I only have ten. I've forgotten someone. And I have no idea who, even as I'm looking over the list. That can't be good.

Lauren Alaina: Candle in the Wind - I actually thought of this one for Scotty, cause I figured it could be given a country twist. I'm so over Lauren. Even though every one seemed to like that - a lot - it was just kinda OK for me.

James Durbin: Saturday Night's Alright for Fighting - My friend Sandy picked this one for James and it's probably a good call for him. There aren't too many words and he can basically scream "Saturday" over and over and over again. Plus, they gave him real flames, so they clearly like him and it doesn't matter what he does. As usual, the judges like him so much more than I do. My husband's take on it, "that was cool."

I had no idea what he meant about having a Pepsi moment, so my husband explained it to me. Look, I have lots of thoughts and I can't keep every single memory of stuff that happened in the past in my head, so I honestly didn't remember that Michael Jackson's hair caught on fire during a Pepsi commercial.

Thia Megia: Daniel - Great, more boring songs for Thia. Actually, I figured she'd sing something from the Lion King. I love how she slowed it down so she could be even more boring than usual. I honestly feel sorry for her, cause she has a lovely voice and they probably should have told her to try out in a couple of years when she's learned to have a personality.

Casey Abrams: Your Song - I wasn't sure this was going to be a good choice for Casey, but the more he let it build, the more I liked it. It was a great decision to do something so quiet and laid back to show America that he can really sing. Plus, it was definitely time to clean up the beard and hair. I'm pretty sure he'll survive the dual elimination this week, just cause of being voted off last week. At least, I hope so.

Jacob Lusk: Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word - I like Jacob and I like how he changed the song around to really suit him. There were some pitch issues, but it never seems to matter when Jacob sings, cause he just carries you along on his personality. I agree with Randy (and I don't say those words often) that he probably should have used the modulation to go to his "Jacob spot."

Haley Reinhart: Bennie and the Jets - Haley! She's the one I forgot. Uh oh. I kinda thought they would save this song for tomorrow night's group Elton medley. I was thinking more like Goodbye Yellow Brick Road for her, but then you don't want to sing a song with the word "goodbye" in it on Idol. This is one of my favorite Elton songs and Haley just made me hate it a little. I used to like Haley, too, so I guess things change.

My bottom three are Naima, Paul and Thia, with an extra side of Haley. I'll be happy to send any two of them home.

I'd even be OK if we sent home all four.

Here We Are, Now Entertain Us

From AmericanIdol.com

So tonight we have the Top 12 performing songs from the year of their birth on American Idol. Who thinks up these things? And why?  Sure it was fun 10 years ago when most of the kids had been born in the 80s.

This is usually the week I decide the order in which they will be eliminated. I don't feel like I know these people well enough to guess yet.  Maybe after tonight.

Naima Adedapo: What's Love Got To Do With It, Tina Turner (1984) - No. You don't take on Tina if you don't have the pipes or the chops. She had neither, plus she took a pass on most of the notes.  That was just weak. It may be all about the feeling for her, but for some of us, it's about the melody.

They're remaking Arthur? What, did Dudley Moore die or something? (According to my husband, yes, he did like 4 years ago. Hmm, I must have missed that.)

Paul McDonald: I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues, Elton John (1984) - His voice is normally wispy anyway, but tonight its pretty rough, so he sounds more like Donald Duck than Macy Gray. (Although, in my opinion, Macy Gray sounds like Donald Duck, too.) It wasn't terrible, but it really wasn't anything too special, either.

Thia Megia: Colors of the Wind, Vanessa Williams (1995) - OK, I get it. She's basically easy listening, like an elevator music artist. But she's cute and young and people like her. Otherwise, I don't understand the appeal.

James Durbin: I'll Be There For You, Bon Jovi  (1989) - I'm so very over him. But he sure was a cute little kid, wasn't he?  Honestly, he picks songs I like, so I agree with his musical taste, I just don't like the way he sings them.  Also, the scream he insists on adding to every song is just wrong. He's neither Adam Lambert or Steven Tyler. Not even close.

Haley Reinhart: I'm Your Baby, Tonight, Whitney Houston (1990) - Either this is actually one Whitney song that I don't know or I just don't recognize it the way it's being sung. Whatever. Haley's growl was interesting the first couple of times, but it's starting to get old.

I have a question....who's this Jimmy guy that's been acting as a mentor every week and what happened to the guest mentors? I must be fast forwarding through too much stuff.

Stefano Langone: If You Don't Know Me By Now, Simply Red (1989) - This was clearly the best pick of the songs he mentioned. By far. So I'm glad he chose it. I just wish he had slowed it down and caressed it a little bit more. Seriously, go listen to Mick Hucknall sing this and you'll agree with me. But he was still better than anyone else we've heard so far.

Pia Toscano: Where Do Lonely Heart Go, Whitney Houston (1988) - I thought the dance beat thing that came and went behind the song was a little off-putting, but let's be honest, she sang the song and it was good. I understood her, she hit all the notes, it sounded like itself, but not like a karaoke version of the original. Isn't that what they should all be trying to do?

Scotty McCreery: Can I Trust You With My Heart, Travis Tritt (1993) - Maybe I haven't mentioned this  before, but I'm not a fan of country music.

Karen Rodriguez: Love Will Lead You Back, Taylor Dayne (1989) - It doesn't matter if she says she's not just the Hispanic singer, when you sing some part of every song in Spanish, guess what? But even if she didn't, she still has that little something in her voice that says she's Hispanic. Also, she's still kinda boring.

I'm getting what the problem is here. Most of these kids have no passion in their voices. They are just singing and that's not enough.

Casey Abrams: Smells Like Teen Spirit, Nirvana (1991) - This guy has had lots of stomach problems and been in and out of the hospital since he started Idol. It worries me. I'm excited that he's switching it up and taking on Nirvana this week. He's not playing it safe, for sure, and no one can call him Joe Cocker after that performance. Absolutely the very best of the night!

I just want to point out that I started watching the show 45 minutes late and I'm just getting to the last two performers and its 9:56. So I almost caught up with the entire 2 hours.

Lauren Alaina: I'm The Only One, Melissa Etheridge (1994) - Can I just point out that her parents look young enough to by my children? I'm on board with the fact that she's adorable and she can sing, so the judges love her. She's a marketing dream. But there's just something so annoying about how...entitled...she acts. Maybe it's just more self-possession than any little kid should have, but I don't like it.  Also, you could hear by that slightly scratchy sound that she was sick, and I refuse to feel sorry for her like she wants me to.

Jacob Lusk: Alone, Heart (1987) - I'm worried about this. No one has done this on AI better than Carrie Underwood back in week two of the Top 12 in Season 4 (the scary part is I didn't even have to look that up). She did it and it was amazing.  I hate for them to sing songs that will get compared to someone who did it better before. Jacob has this way of overdoing things (maybe  you've noticed) and he gets screamy. I'm not sure that's a good sound for this song. Actually, that wasn't as bad as it could have been. The thing is, I like him and I want him to last. I think he's safe, especially since he went last.

My bottom three would be Naima, Thia and Karen, but I'm guessing that America likes Thia more than I do, so maybe the third person will be Haley.

As for who is going home....I think Karen has sung her last note in Spanish on the Idol stage.