Honestly, I'm not sure why I even care anymore, cause I don't. Care. I don't care. And yet here I am.
OK, the show is just starting and I'm trying to read Steven Tyler's lips....who is he saying "I love you" to, cause I'm pretty sure it's not me. Or at least I don't think so. Maybe he knows I bought his book.
I want to fast-forward through this incredibly bad group number, but then I'm worried that I won't be able to fast-forward through something even worse that's yet to come. My husband just asked me, "Who picks these songs, who thinks this is good, what the heck is wrong with them?" All very good questions. I wish I had the answer.
I was thinking today about all the shenanigans that go on behind the scenes (and sometimes right in front of our faces) on this show. All the many ways that Uncle Nigel and the judges attempt to sway our votes. I was thinking how no one could really fall for all that stuff, right? I mean, any normal, intelligent human being knows that they are being manipulated, right? Right?? But then I spoke with my mom about who's going to be eliminated tonight. My mom is 83 years old and I always thought she was of above average intelligence.
But she was telling me about how Haley didn't do well and how good James, Scotty and Jacob were. What? She was completely being manipulated and she has no idea. None. Of course, she also thinks Jacob is straight. So maybe she's not as smart as I thought.
I'm not sure what omelet making has to do with singing, but I'm thinking maybe a new season of Hell's Kitchen (or is it Master Chef?) is starting soon and Gordon's contract wouldn't allow him to get out of this bit of cross promotion.
And see, now I'm happy I didn't fast-forward through the group number cause I got to fast-forward through Lady Antebellum.
Ryan says we might be surprised about who is going home tonight. Please, please, please tell me it's Lauren or Scotty. Cause other than that, I don't see myself being surprised. Well, I guess it would be a little surprising if it was James, since he was pimped to the skies last night and he kinda sucked. And I would be less surprised if it was Lauren.
James Durbin is first up and he heads to the far side of the stage. Lauren Alaina is next and she takes position on the near side.
I would be fast-forwarding through JLo's, um, thing that she's doing here, but my husband wants to see it. He's clearly a glutton for punishment. I absolutely don't understand this kind of display. I know they call it music, but I wish I was listening to Aerosmith right now. I definitely don't understand the point of a lone white guy randomly walking around and yelling into a mic. I know everyone seems to do that lately, but I think it's stupid.
OK, back to eliminations. Next we have Jacob Lusk, joining Lauren. Then Haley Reinhart joins James. Which leaves Scotty to pick a group. Um, so that kinda makes it seem like Haley is going, cause I think no one would be surprised with a bottom two made up of Jacob and Lauren.
Wait, unless the surprise is about Scotty....no. That can't happen, he's the favorite son this year. He's got to make Top 3. And yes, Scotty is safe and he declines to pick a group, which is the way it should be.
So, no surprise here, the bottom two are Jacob and Lauren. But here's the question. If it turns out that Lauren is safe, is she really in the bottom two? Cause how can we ever know.
In any case, Jacob is the one going home, and seriously, as much as I don't like Lauren, I think it's time to send Jacob home. I think he's ready to go, too. Really, he was much better in the early rounds and he's been getting worse and worse under the pressure of this show.
Pia was signed like hours after she was voted off , I'm sure the same will hold true for Jacob.
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